Sometimes I just wish I could video 24/7 my time in the Quarter for people to watch. Maybe then I could do something that would really make a difference. For now, I feel my efforts are wholly inadequate - inadequate in that so much more help is needed and inadequate because I meet so many beautiful people who deserve so much more than I can offer.

Today Esther took me to meet a woman, a girl really, named Florence. Florence is 20 years old and is the head of a 7-person family. Her parents, who were HIV positive, are dead. As the eldest, she cares for 5 younger siblings and one son. She, too, is HIV positive and her skin, tightly pulled against her bones, attests to it. The disease is leaving its imprint and her health continues to deteriorate.

She has barely enough money to feed her family, let alone send the children to school. It will cost about $900 to cover the annual school fees to enable the 6 children to attend school. Realistically, I know there are still many other children who I am committed to through the work of Project Have Hope, who are looking to me to finance their education. How can I possibly pay for the school fees for all 6 children when there are so many other families also struggling and depending on me? How can I tell Florence that I can only provide her with money to put one or 2 children in school and ask her to decide which child will be given a future and which will not? How do I walk away and not feel utterly helpless and useless?

It’s time for tea. The swarm of ladies has diminished as they take leave to return to their daily rigors - gathering water, doing laundry, preparing food, and going to work in the stone quarry. It’s still a bit early, but Esther ushers me back to her home for our morning ritual of tea.

As we sit waiting for her daughters to bring the tea, Cecilia enters, offering me her usual Fanta - nice and cold. Esther instructs me not to drink it, to take tea first so I can warm up since she feels I must be cold. It’s at least 85 degrees and 48 hours earlier I was shoveling a foot of snow and sleet from my driveway. I was certainly not cold.

Esther took out a box with a porcelain tea set, smiling just as dignified as the cups she placed in front of me. Her pride in this new acquisition was evident as she carefully unwrapped each piece. Her daughter brought the tea. I first poured Esther her cup full and then added 2 heaping spoons of sugar (I know well how much Esther loves sugar). I looked up, questioning if she’d like more. She giggled as she motioned for one more heaping spoonful. I poured a cup for myself and we shared the tea and feasted on cassava (my favorite) and g-nuts. This same ritual will be performed nearly every day until I leave.

So much for sleeping in this morning. I arrived at the Jeliza Guesthouse last night about 11:30. For weeks I’d dreamed about sleeping until midday, catching up on the sleep I’ve been deprived of the last few weeks. Waking up fresh. Ready to greet my friends and the challenges that lie ahead.

But those hours of sleep were taken away by the simple words of Deo, my trusty driver and friend, “The traffic is too much. I will pick you up at 8 tomorrow morning to take you to the Acholi Quarter.” Deo knows best. Sleep will wait.

Promptly at 8am, Deo pulls into the Jeliza and into his car we reload 5 large duffle bags, literally bursting at the seams - the head of a teddy bear poking through one hole and a new pair of shoes perilously dangling from another.

We travel swiftly through roads not yet clogged with the heavy traffic of Kampala to the Acholi Quarter, to where my friends await. I direct Deo to make a right onto a dirt path, more a path than a road, to wind his way up a different entrance to the Quarter than he’s come before. This path will lead us directly to the building we’ve finally completed - the meeting point for the members of Project Have Hope. As we approach, I barely recognize the building, now strengthened by cement walls and fitted with iron windows. But I recognize the faces of the nearly 50 women gathered outside the building, waiting my anticipated arrival.

Before Deo’s car can come to a stop, the women, recognizing the white-faced muzunga seated inside, encircle the vehicle with the shrill shrieks that accompany all of the Acholi’s celebrations. Shrieks and clapping and laughter drown out all other sounds as I’m passed from person to person and greeted with handshakes and hugs and the welcoming, “Apoyo bino.” As I try to return the frantic rush of hugs, I try desperately to avoid suffocating the babies clutching to their mothers’ backs. As the frenzy continues, I see Esther, standing toward the back of the crowd, with a quiet smile, waiting for me to reach her.

Esther, my surrogate mother, my friend - the woman who binds all the other women together into one cohesive unit - waits with a smile. I am home. I am among friends. And I’m not tired anymore.

Project Have Hope works with a group of 100 women in the Acholi Quarter of Uganda and helps them transform their lives and the lives of their families. Through the sale of their beautiful, handmade paper bead jewelry, the women can feed their families, send their children to school, and look forward to a richer future.

2007 Milestones

• Project Have Hope sponsoring 31 children in school
• Micro-loans enabled 24 women to expand or start new businesses
• Brick construction building completed, including 2 offices, a small library and a large meeting area
• Fourteen women enrolled in vocational training programs
• Three cooperatives established in the village